You can't motorboat a personality
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
