when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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