I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
