Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
