This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
