if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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