Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
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Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
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Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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