just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize