did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
It's just like the Real World with babies
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
