He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
