I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
