she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Boobs are out for the taking
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
We're too hungover to prance.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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