I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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