we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I have aggressive nipples.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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