So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
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She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
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Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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