I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize