Its about making memories worth repressing
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
