Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize