Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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