we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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