We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
