I'm gonna have a badass scar
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
