You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She told me I should be a condom model.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
