Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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