i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize