nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
