At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I have aggressive nipples.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize