i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
whose parrot is this?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
