4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
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