Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
