Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
