she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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