OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
