Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize