Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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