is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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