I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
