I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
