come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
