dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
