You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.