Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time

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  (650): Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time http://tfl.nu/rwso
  Replies (3) Good night (1393) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.

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  (206): This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it. http://tfl.nu/dmrx
  Replies (13) Good night (1849) Bad night (525)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"

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  (714): DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job" http://tfl.nu/slki
  Replies (24) Good night (1178) Bad night (3256)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I heard you threw up in your lap?

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  I heard that too.

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  (541): I heard you threw up in your lap? (1-541): I heard that too. http://tfl.nu/s86w
  Replies (9) Good night (1640) Bad night (3641)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.

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  (540): You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm. http://tfl.nu/f71e
  Replies (13) Good night (5172) Bad night (1057)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!

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  (336): That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on! http://tfl.nu/2bv6
  Replies (10) Good night (3570) Bad night (992)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?

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  (504): Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober? http://tfl.nu/e9ou
  Replies (9) Good night (1167) Bad night (3180)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.

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  (704): He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza. http://tfl.nu/a4a2
  Replies (8) Good night (1028) Bad night (2816)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?

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  (724): Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos? http://tfl.nu/mgyg
  Replies (27) Good night (3933) Bad night (1012)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party

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  (251): I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party http://tfl.nu/8yh5
  Replies (12) Good night (3770) Bad night (1131)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.

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  (508): we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos. http://tfl.nu/o4i1
  Replies (25) Good night (3330) Bad night (939)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now

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  (403): Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now http://tfl.nu/l7gb
  Replies (11) Good night (3616) Bad night (1089)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am

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  (225): My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am http://tfl.nu/6fcm
  Replies (0) Good night (652) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.

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  (202): Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive. http://tfl.nu/gois
  Replies (3) Good night (620) Bad night (255)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.

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  (636): Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you. http://tfl.nu/ltvz
  Replies (1) Good night (515) Bad night (286)

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