clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize