ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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