There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.