Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
a search helicopter?!
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Dick very happy bro
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
