yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
