I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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