I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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