Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
