There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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