Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
i think im in europe. pls send help
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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